If Looks Could Kill

Stacey and I decided to do a little research and development regarding my wedding attire. Since I didn't have my mom there I wasn't too keen on finding "THE ONE". I just wanted to get an idea of what style worked best for me and to get a general idea of what I was looking for. Unlike the typical bride, I have not been dreaming of my wedding since I was 4 years old, so I've never had a clear vision of what my dress will look like. Anyway, I won't show you the dresses that I'm considering but I will show you the dresses that did not make the cut for whatever reason. I will also say that the "maybe" dresses are just that. Maybe. I took issue with each of the dresses I tried on for different reasons but I don't want to rule them out entirely.

So, to begin the day we head on over to House of Brides. Now, I was operating under the impression that places like this - places that market themselves as Wedding Malls, didn't require an appointment. I was wrong. We roll into HOB all smiles and greet the woman at the front desk. She was pleasant, asks if we have an appointment. Still, all smiles I say "No, I didn't know I needed one and we sort of just decided to do this last minute, I'm sorry." Now, you would think that we just told this woman her car was being towed. This was how disgusted she was at the fact that we did not have an appointment. I couldn't even be upset that she was so annoyed because it was so funny. Like a switch had been flipped. I almost died. She was so put out. The hood part of me wanted to tell her off and say "Look lady, I realize we don't have an appointment, but I am not demanding to see your inventory this very second. Pick up your damn pencil, pick the next available time and put my GD name down." I didn't say that though. Always pleasant, I apologized again and said we would take the next available appointment. LESSON LEARNED. Make an appointment - for everything. People don't like when you just show up.

Anyway, we head over to David's Bridal where you also needed and appointment (who knew?! It's David's Bridal!) but they were very nice and accomodating and we were in within 15 minutes. I didn't try on much at either place and to be honest, HOB was very, very underwhelming. Thankfully, I have plenty of time to find something so I'm not discouraged.

So, the moment you've been waiting for. The "No" Dresses.

Tulle - NO.

For obvious reasons, this is a bit FAT no. There is not a single part of me that looks thin. Not even my fingers. Maybe my hair. Yes, it makes my hair look thin. Other than that, the most unflattering dress I tried on. It had a very pretty detail around the waist though. The only reason I tried this monstrosity on was because I heard you are supposed to try on several different styles, just so you know. Plus, Stacey made me.

Old Lady - No.

I felt very old in this dress. The consultant made me try it on because she'd never seen it on anybody before. It has all types of detailing and flowers and some satin - which I am trying to avoid. Pretty, but no.

CHA CHA - No.

I really only tried this on to be funny. This is really not me - with all those bullsh*t ruffles on the bottom. I'm getting married, not performing on Dancing with the Stars.

Too fancy - and heavy.

This dress actually looked pretty good on (in person). I'm not really a big fan of this material. It's super shiny. Not to mention, this is better suited for a more formal affair, which I don't plan to have.

Well, that's it. Now I know what works and what does not. My advice to people who don't have a clear idea of what they are looking for is to just go and try on different styles. Don't focus so much on finding "THE DRESS" the first time around, you could end up very discouraged. Knowing what style you are looking for really helps narrow down your options and your dress consultants will LOVE that.